Blog
The Biggest Problem In Comics
02/25/2024
I am extremely upset about something, I need to vent about it, and I happen to have a blog that this SORT OF applies to. I know DC comics in the modern era are only loosely tied to their classic continuity, and are basically in a perpetual state of self-reinvention. This does mean that sometimes they come up with some fun, innovative ideas that evolve their characters in a fun new way, but because they’re not necessarily working to tie any of those ideas to what came before, It falls to us, if we want to incorporate those ideas in our headcanon, to do the work to make those connections for them.
That’s not what this is about at all.
This is about this monstrosity, that was introduced in Hawkgirl #4 in December of last year.
That’s not what this is about at all.
This is about this monstrosity, that was introduced in Hawkgirl #4 in December of last year.
I might be a comic fan, but I am also a huge lover of the idea of regional food, and this is just tragic. I love, love, LOVE the idea of introducing regional food into the fictional cities of DC, but they need to operate like regional food. Regional food is NOT a bunch of hipster condiment bullshit… it’s a very specific concoction that you HAVE TO GET RIGHT. What’s in a Philly Cheesesteak? Thin-sliced ribeye with fried onions, with either provolone, white American, or cheese whiz, on a toasted hoagie roll. That’s IT. Do you know what would happen to you if you walked into Pat’s Steaks and asked for mustard? You better have an exit strategy.
Here… for comparison… let’s look at this flowchart for one of the best regional hot dogs in the country, the Chicago Dog.
Here… for comparison… let’s look at this flowchart for one of the best regional hot dogs in the country, the Chicago Dog.
So you CAN get creative with ingredients, but it still needs to function. It needs to feel like it is representing the story of the place it’s from and building something everyone loves. No one loves your canned peaches on a hot dog idea. That was bad and you should feel bad. Even the fried egg is a stretch, because it's just completely out of left field for left field's sake and isn't contributing to the narrative of the hot dog.
Here; let’s actually put our money where our mouth is. Let’s invent a Metropolis Dog. We imagine that Metropolis is sitting on the watershed of the Lafayette River in Virginia, in place of the real-world Norfolk & Newport News. Metropolis is often referred to as the Big Apricot, and that absolutely makes sense in VA, which has apricot orchards. Let’s make a fun regional quirk and say that there are restaurants in Metropolis that are known for their apricot chili. So what’s on the Metropolis Dog; Apricot Chili, Onions, Sauerkraut, Old Bay Seasoning. Boom. Metropolis Dog.
I feel better.
Also, Jadzia Axelrod’s Hawkgirl has been a fun read, and despite her absolute failure to create an adequate regional hot dog, you should still read it.
Here; let’s actually put our money where our mouth is. Let’s invent a Metropolis Dog. We imagine that Metropolis is sitting on the watershed of the Lafayette River in Virginia, in place of the real-world Norfolk & Newport News. Metropolis is often referred to as the Big Apricot, and that absolutely makes sense in VA, which has apricot orchards. Let’s make a fun regional quirk and say that there are restaurants in Metropolis that are known for their apricot chili. So what’s on the Metropolis Dog; Apricot Chili, Onions, Sauerkraut, Old Bay Seasoning. Boom. Metropolis Dog.
I feel better.
Also, Jadzia Axelrod’s Hawkgirl has been a fun read, and despite her absolute failure to create an adequate regional hot dog, you should still read it.